Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Forgiving Yourself

***I apologize for the absence. My brother got married on Saturday, it has been a bit chaotic***

While this journey to becoming a better me has mostly been about weight loss and getting healthier there have been other improvements along the way. Areas of myself that maybe I didn't even know I was lacking in or never even thought of improving.

One of those areas that never crossed my mind, learning to forgive myself

When I would eat foods I shouldn't (like a whole thing of Oreo's), go overboard at a buffet to the point of being uncomfortable, or simply not eat I would get mad at myself. I would criticize myself for eating foods I knew weren't healthy, for over eating on those unhealthy foods. I became mad at myself which would lead to more binge eating of crap food. It was a vicious cycle.

My unforgiving ways would also go to my workouts. If I overslept I would beat myself up all day. Like seriously, how could you not get out of bed, laziness, pure laziness. Then as I would be relaxing on the couch at night I would have this nagging voice that I needed to go do something. I needed to stop being a bum on the couch.

Yea, I was mean to myself. I was very unforgiving when I would slip-up.

I'm not sure why I beat myself up.

I obviously wasn't perfect before I started this journey.

Not sure why I thought that starting this journey I would never miss a workout or eat crap foods.

I knew I would, because I'm not perfect. If I was perfect I wouldn't be trying to lose the weight in the first place!

Source- pin.terest

Here lately though I've been forgiving myself.

Now this is not to be confused with making excuses. There is a HUGE difference!

For example, this wedding and helping my mom get everything around has made for some long nights and restless sleep.  There were times that I chose to sleep instead of doing my 5am workouts.

Old Megan would have beat myself up about it but not done anything on my own.

Improved Megan acknowledged that my body needed the sleep and then since I also knew that I needed to workout I pushed myself to do it. Alone. No gym. No coach. Just me and Reagan (usually). I didn't use the excuse I was tired to sit my butt on the couch at night. I used that as motivation, like hey I didn't work out this morning so now I have to use my evening to do it!

source- pint.terest

The same goes for eating.

I don't eat perfect. I try my hardest to be healthy 80-90% of the time. There's times I don't. Not beating myself up as I continue to lick the brownie batter but instead, stop eating the crap, acknowledge that I did and do some burpees to feel better!

It is just amazing to me how this journey is shaping me into the woman I always knew I was but had forgotten I could be.

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Boot Camp Day 2

Day 2

Advocare Chocolate Shake made into a muffin with 2tbsp peanut butter

Leftover Ham Steak & green beans

Hamburger (no bun)

Blue Diamond Strawberry Almonds
Medium Honeycrisp Apple with 2tbsp peanut butter

Water intake-149.2oz

Steps- 9,024 not quite 10k but better than the day before at 6,849

Exercise- I slept in. Did not make it to the gym and the weather was nice so Matt was spraying so no gym in the evening. I decided to make my own and went up to the Shrine park with Reagan and we walked, did tricep dips, and 2 workout programs from Instagram. Ended up with a great workout in am hour and a tired baby.

Old Megan would have just walked or said screw it, new Megan voluntarily did burpees, crazy stuff!

Monday, June 2, 2014

Boot Camp

Today was the first day for the buddy boot camp at the gym. I have a pretty awesome buddy and we are ready to kick butt!

In order to keep myself accountable during this 8 week boot camp I plan on blogging about my daily intakes, exercises and whatever else comes to mind. This will be pretty similar to the posts I did about the 24 day challenge (starting here).

My buddy A and I are planning on heading to the store together on Saturday morning and we are going to be texting each other throughout the day to keep us in check. We both are usually at the gym in the mornings and we both want to get some 2 a days in. With the boot camp we get personal trainings and our hope is to be able to do them on Sunday mornings. That way I don't have to worry about a sitter for Reagan. Plus, I will get a good start to my Sunday which usually according to my fitbit is my laziest day.

Day 1

Advocare Berry Shake

Modified "stir fry"- veggies and chicken no rice
Blue Diamond Strawberry Almonds

Ham steak and a veggie

Best Life Peanut Butter Extreme Protein Bar
Medium Honeycrisp Apple with 2tbsp peanut butter

Water intake- So far today I am at 129.5. My goal is at very least a gallon but more along the lines of 150oz.

Steps- 10,000 so far today I am at 3,602

Exercise- I woke up late but still managed to get a 45 minute spin/lift in.

Goals for the bootcamp-
1. 30lbs total.
2. I'm bad at figuring out inches lost but lets shoot for 10 inches.
3. Run a mile without stopping
4. Full out burpee

Week 1 goal- 3lbs

1. Shopping for 2 new pair of jeans
2. Massage
3. Pedicure

There it is, all laid out for the world to see.

Bring it boot camp, you ain't got nothin on me!